As I lay here at 5:41 am, I think about how much I try to take care of my health. From my late 20’s until now, I have experienced unexplained chronic pain. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia back in December of 2017. However, on top of that, by the time I hit my early 30’s I felt wore down and never at 100%. Then I have a diagnosis of chronic fatigue. That’s just nice isn’t it?
What angers me the most is that I get my annual blood work and my Autoimmune levels are always high. I’m always told I have “antibodies” of an autoimmune disorder. I’ve tested for Lupus/SLE, Sjogrens, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Systemic Scleroderma, and others that could be the cause. Everything normally comes back clean.
I keep being told the antibodies are there but no definitive diagnosis. It’s hard because most of the time, I am told there’s nothing really wrong with me or that it could be “stress”. I have a higher pain tolerance than most where it feels like consistent tension 24/4 rather than a sharp pain consistent (unless I overdo it). What my test results say versus what I feel verses what they say don’t match or don’t really add up.
We’re always told we’re resilient. We’re told we are “strong black women”. We can’t be strong and resilient every moment of the day.
For almost 6 years years, I’ve been trying to seek answers as to why my body is reacting the way it does and why my body decided to have an unknown autoimmune condition that doctors don’t want to explore. They have even sent me to a rheumatologist who didn’t do much at all.
I think at this point, I just want to be taken seriously and want to know why when I’m a genuinely health adult.
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