Perfectionism is a double-edged sword

I’ll admit it, I’m a perfectionist, and one of the things that’s helped me tremendously is learning how to be kinder in the way I talk to myself or looking at creative inspiration.

I don’t know when it started but I always just had to give “my all,” my absolute best, even if I didn’t have much left in me to offer.

I remember, I walked around feeling exhausted, anxious, and depressed. I never thought too much of it. I was pretty strict with the expectations I set for myself especially my academic success. Yes, I learned things quickly but too many thought I was really smart. However my thoughts were filled with phrases like, “I’m supposed to…” “I should do better,” “Get it together,” “You’re better than this,” and “It’s not that serious, WORK HARDER.”

Sven though, I didn’t realize any of this until my late 20’s, I began focusing on myself and being kind to myself. My reality was crafted around those limiting thoughts and beliefs I carried for so long. I wanted to be more positive and kind to myself, but I didn’t know where to start. A lot of the “positivity” I saw online was “good vibes only” and “just be happy.” None of it was helping me reframe my thoughts. I couldn’t simply switch my mind off and make myself a master at self-compassion and positive self-talk (I wished, though. Imagine how easy that would be!?)

I rummaged through the not-so-helpful advice I saw online. Affirmations, mantras, and original self-made quotes became my best friends. Of course, it’s a little harder since I suffer with anxiety and depression. I learned to say “no” to what doesn’t align with my heart.

It’s OK to experience negative emotions, and with support, we can help people who are stuck in negativity find their own way out. Simply telling them to “be positive” doesn’t cut it.” And it doesn’t just “go away”

I hope you can be kind to yourself today, too. You deserve it.

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