There are times I look for people to care. I don’t necessarily rave validation but I needed to be told that I was cared about rather than being called “weird” all the time.
I can be alone. I prefer it but I’m more afraid of being attached to anyone and them leaving or abandoning me. I’m very selective of who I get close to. It’s actually a dangerous pattern to fall in to because that gives the perception of being a little “stand-off-ish”.
The ones I do select really never stay, which furthers the chain. I protect everyone else’s feelings and neglect my own. That’s what fear of abandonment does. It makes you accept less than you deserve.
Here’s what I will tell you, you do not deserve anything short of perfection. You deserve someone who will treat you with respect.