I didn’t grow hearing I was “pretty” often. In fact, it was the opposite. I heard quite often that I was ugly. That I was “poor” (even though I wasn’t). During my adolescence, I didn’t have friends or those I could trust. I’d be subject to more critique of how I looked rather than any of my gifts.
I remember, in elementary school, no one would play with me. I was tall and shy at the time so I was dismissed by classmates rather than accepted. There were even times kids would purposely trip me to make me fall or just push me. They laughed and I just walked away confused not understanding why kids was so mean but believing that they wouldn’t play with me because I was ugly.
I spent most of my life actually resenting my looks. I hated my lips, my weight, my head shape, the sound of my voice, and smile. I became self conscious of how I look.
I had to work really hard to learn to love myself, embrace my physical attributes, and affirm my soul. I do everything I can to shower myself with love and affirmation as much as I need to.
Every now and again I visit my younger self and shower her with that same love. I visit my younger self and I kiss her forehead. I look her in the eyes and tell her you are so beautiful. You are precious. I hold her in my arms for dear life and I let her know that the days of looking herself in the mirror with resentment are numbered. Things have changed and her reflection won’t hurt as much. In fact it won’t hurt at all.
To those of you who didn’t grow hearing you are beautiful, I hope you know that you are not alone. You can always go back to your younger self and let them know. ✨
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