I have always showed signs of social anxiety since I was real young. As a child, I was labeled shy, antisocial and sensitive. I had large gatherings especially at school or with other adults. I always felt uncomfortable being the center of attention. My body would always freeze for a few minutes whether it was to read aloud in school or presentations. No one ever knew even to this day. Even as an adult, I am able to do social tasks well but my body would become numb with nervousness and constantly on edge.
Talking with other people is another story. I am very talkative when I am talking with others that seems to listen. At the same time, I can easily walk past you and not say a word especially when I don’t know you. Too much social interaction drains me to the point of utter fatigue.
If people really understood before passing judgement, they would see that I’m always nervous of what people may say about me. I’m always wondering if someone is laughing at me. This is a everyday struggle. The anxiety is an everyday struggle. I do not suffer from panic attacks, however I will get pains in my stomach and throughout my nerves in my body. No can see it. No one will realize it. I smile like everything is okay. It is, however a struggle no one understands unless they are dealing with it.
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